Saturday, July 14, 2007

i'm not dyslexic, i'm just a crap typer

in much the same way that i was not designed to iron clothes, cook 4 course meals with lots of demi glaces's, and blanche hand grown vegetables, i was never destined to be a secretary, support person, administrative assisstant or any other port wine reduction of an office wench that has a 'words per minute accuracy' requirement. not to bang on about it again, but i'm completely crap at multi tasking, cannot operate a phone to transfer a call to save my life, and i frankly do not see the point in spending my time (and money) commuting to the drycleaners to collect my overpriced blouses and pencil skirts from express or the limited (when i could be productively wasting it in a variety of other ways), to be the gateway (bimbo) face of a company. the accent should be enough.

i have been asked (aggressively confronted) on why it is that i am able to type a narcissistic narrative to anyone in blog format, but am incapable of composing an email, that appears to have been written by an illiterate eastern bloc native, to friends and family. have you people not received that forwarded harvard study on mistyped words, where the first and last letters are the key components in receptive language comprehension?

admittedly my brain is operating at jeff gordon or dale earnhart warp speeds, while my fingers are functioning consistent to nancy reagan's perplexing tempo at the plastic surgeon's office. i find it quite unfair to have had emails returned with demands of spell check before a response (dad) is issued. ultimately these nitpickers should not be complaining, because the fact is; im a bloody good pen pal- consistent, with lots of interesting information- like the bbc world service news. only juicier.

teh edn.

2 comments:

total-spender said...

I'm not a crap typer, I'm just dyslexic.

maggie said...

i mix numbers back and forth like 545 or 74. i'm not the only one. i had a complete 5 minute interrupted convo w/ my DAD on the phone because i misused she/her or me/i. usually it's just me/i....so now i do it to others too. but she and her?? COME ON DAMMIT....but deeser....your emails are unbelievable at times. kettle.....black....yeah that's me