Thursday, July 19, 2007

bonne anniversaire

birthdays are such an interesting event for the non-jehovah's among us. some (emotionally stuck) individuals see it as an opportunity for recognition as an "event" of national holiday proportions. these people often do not not find it enough to have their birthday mentioned (along with any other employees) in the company's monthly newsletter. so in case anyone missed the memo/was out sick/on vacation/blind/cant read, they spend the preceding week, not so much dropping hints, as announcing it to 'hot handyman extreme makeover ty pennington with a megaphone' proportions. these peoples' biggest debate is whether or not to take the day off work, or to go into work, but not actually do anything except complain about being there on their "special day".

presents are obviously an integral part of any birthday, even if you stopped pinning tails on donkeys 3 decades ago. gifts can either function as a way to enable the birthday boy/girl in their behaviours, or serve as as a giant hint that changes and improvements are needed.

apparently i have turned into my father, or anyone's father for that matter. while i do not yet get socks, i am receiving a lot of underwear. i believe this would be the "improvement gift", as i don't think that certificates to book shops are hints that i need to hone my reading skills (these gift givers are in fact the enablers of my addiction). going into my 32nd year, my knicker drawer now resembles a bridal trousseau, perhaps a hint from my mother that its time to stop messing about playing musical chairs/pinning tails on donkeys/passing parcels, and stop playing musical boyfriend/start pinning flowers on a bridegroom/passing a grandchild. unfortunately i already have an excess of "unmentionables" accumulated over several "lost luggage" incidents.

and this is my problem; aside from books, an excess of anything agitates me no end. i get overwhelmed having too many knickers to wear, perhaps i should double up on them, do laundry less often, or fly out of chicago more. i would even be willing to donate a multipack of M&S cotton undies to some birthday deprived jehovah witnesses.

1 comment:

JAWZ DREE said...

Better than being "Knickerless in Luville"
ZWAJ