Friday, July 10, 2009

sticks and stones

"what's the worst thing you could be called?"

[the sample group comprised of educators, social workers, and a photo journalist, all advancing into the third decade].

'kiddo'. found particularly patronizing when used by co-workers. perhaps it's the daddy issues, but i took no umbrage when "53 year old beer gut" used this term at the track while running "800's" (that means something that could potentially require AED equipment).

'honey', 'sweetie' and anything that can be located on the 'little debbie' shelf at the supermarket. again, any colleague that opts for this aggregate of saccharine nouns requires an immediate ostracism from chit chat about the most recent celebrity b-lister flashing her wax job upon exiting a limo. significant others- other people's significant others- should come thoughtfully equipped with sick bags for dispensing to those of us within earshot of their effuse exchange.

"i don't care about 'bitch' or 'C U Next Tuesday'." i suppose if it's coming from a peroxide blonde, sporting a ramen noodle perm, wielding one of jerry springer's chairs, then i doubt that it would be enough of a slur to stir me from a repeat episode of 'the real housewives of atlanta'.

'fat'.

and suddenly we are in the kind of tacit agreement that the US commander in chief's, circa. 1970, have wanted to happen on their watch, between israel and palestine.

2 comments:

mansuetude said...

when i got down to the end i laughed outloud! SO funny.

what word bothers me? Lately, "hey girl" is getting trite... or "dude" which came around for a while in a group of us being ironic about its capacity as a word!

Disa said...

for some reason they seem to punctuate sentences with "very good" here- that bugs me. someone else told me they couldn't stand "little girl".