Monday, November 5, 2007

organic mountain biking

asheville; where the parking garages look like subaru dealerships and even the homeless are a north face wearing eco-friendly bunch asking for your restaurant leftovers instead of cash. this past weekend i drove down to the carolinas to ride the issaqueena trails (clemson) with another skorted friend (and former evacuee of louisville). we resumed our natural riding patterns; me upfront collecting cobwebs with my face, she listening to me spit and gag from behind. unfortunately being first also means navigating (have i mentioned that i have directional dyslexia?).

we got rather lost.

while i did remember the "hotel-with-purple-sign-by-the-traffic-lights-at-the-bottom-of-the-hill-on-the-strip-with-all-the-apartment-buildings-leading-up-to-the-park", my brain became flatulent upon entering the trail. unfortunately these trails were not "colour coded for idiots", nor were they nicely taped and marked "for my conveniance" as they had been when i rode the course prior to a mountain bike race several years ago. fortunately there were many equestrians depositing steamy trail markers for us to follow. however, these rugged, ruddy, outdoorsy folk also yielded and greeted, and did not throw cigarettes, cans of bud light, or flip their mullets at us, as i have experienced with some of their kentucky counterparts. the trail really is shared.

the trails were (as i remembered) fun, fast, singletracky switchbacks with many, many moments of "oh god, oh god, dont look down, dont look to the right, ignore the abyss 2 centimetres to the left where i could potentially tumble, uninterrupted, until i baptize myself and the bike in the lake, at which point nessy, with incisors of steel, will come and chew on my limp, twitching form".

unfortunately the weekend drew to a close and i was asked to leave; i do not drive a subaru.


mansuetude said...

A flatulent Brain? You are so creative... I am so jealous of this idea.

Did is seem as dry in Ashville as in KY? We really need rain. Do all the people there drive subaru?

Happily Even After said...

I doubt any place on earth can compete with Seattle's corner on the market on Subies. We've got some pretty good mtn biking in these parts too.

Anyway, I wanted to let you know that I TAGGED you in my blog. It's a meme (I just looked that up on wikipedia--verry interesting) where you list 8 things about you on your blog, then tag another handful of people. (But no pressure--seriously.) You can read the rules in my post where I tagged you:

Bike on...

Serendipity delle Stelle said...

Swallowing that is poetic! I agree, I love the brain flatulence. What do you take for that? Bean-O, Ritalin or crack?

Jill said...

Sounds SO FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!! Except for the drop off. Oh and the cobweb choking. The lack of mullet flipping probably makes up for that though! :-)

disa said...

~i would like to see what a brain shart looks like!

~an opportunity to talk about me??? how fabulously high school! you are a wonerful woman (and writer) for giving me all these plugs, janna

~i think cobwebs are full of protein, so they probably would pack you up a bit. the solution? COFFEE! lots and lots of COFFEE.

~i guess the trails of south carolina could go one of two ways- mullety rednecks on horses waving rebel flags, or southern belles in oversized straw hats sipping iced tea, riding side saddle