i agreed to play on a flag football team that one of my co-workers is putting together. i have never played football (american, not rest of the world), i do not understand football, i dont even watch the superbowl. it showed.
our group assembled at a local park on saturday morning, where the male/female ratio was (inexplicably) in favour of the ladies. we practiced how to throw (and catch) the ball correctly. during this warm up phase, i did indeed catch the ball. with my face.
once on the field, things did improve. i was issued very concrete 3 step directives "move forward 5 steps, head right and be prepared to catch". i did in fact catch the ball, however, i was so shocked that i'd actually caught it (not to mention feeling all gloaty on the inside) that i neglected to move with ball in hand, and an opponent yanked the flag from my belt.
football does have an entirely new lexical set that i am not familiar with; "rushing", "i-formation", and "other terms i cant remember now". however, a team name is something i can contribute my thoughts and creativity to; considering the excess of biting wit, and universal interest in all things fecal, i am holding out for "the sarcastic sharts". it would make a great t-shirt.