Thursday, June 7, 2007

dear diary, or 'oh shit, lets indulge in yet another weak ego, adolescent moment'

"letting go" (yes, i like to perseverate on certain things), according to my personal dictionary, means moving into a state of accepting that the past is past, and the people that you were so intensely present in the present with, are also; past. something of a relief, but also something that induces 5 year old resistance.

erikson postulated on the psychosocial stages of development, where the moratorium phase encompassed the abyss between adolescent and adult. although i truly believe that this comes at the proscribed time that guys start browsing the "just for men" products, and the y chromosomes amongst us embrace silicone and bleach.

closure (again refer to the 'disa dictionary definition' 58th. ed.) is not one final step, door, or coffin nail; rather it is a multilayer of cabbage, directly related to ongoing experiences (and re-experiences) in the maslow-vian 'hiearachy of needs'.

the shift from fantasy, which inevitably becomes temporal reality and finally abstract history, is as hard to swallow as something i am not going to mention because i do believe that my dad (and their swedish next door neighbour) checks this blog. the challenge is to re-frame 'letting go'; not as someone holding onto your greasy fingers as you hang over the niagara precipice, but rather the pruning of the dead (drama) that prevents new possibilities (although that doesnt sound nearly as exciting subject matter for the blog gristle).

*disclaimer: this was typed BUI; "blogging under the influence" (which, for those who receive emails from me, would acknowledge that it has actually been spell checked).

1 comment:

total-spender said...

Blogging under the influence? Would that be Total Blogging?

You raise a few familiar names in your post from my university days, Maslow's hierarchy of needs being one - all very middle class if my memory serves me correct (which it usually doesn't).

Hmmm, must be weird your family reading your musings (and even weirder knowing the neighbors are also keeping an eye on you..)