can someone, please, give me a time out?

the reccomendation is 1 minute for each year of life. this means that i should get 32 minutes (i dont mind rounding up, my birthday is next month) of sitting in a quiet area with no one talking to me. if i were to start swearing or getting out of my seat i would get an extra minute added for each infraction; 2 "bloody hells", 1 "christ on a cracker" and i lost track of how many variations of "shit". that would add up to a lot of peace, quiet, and reflection (of better ways to not be heard next time).

yesterday i went to the mecca of the 'themed holiday sweater brigade'; the parent teacher store. my mission was to find a special kind of "time timer" which shows the leftover minutes as a block of colour that disappears; very useful for the teeny tiny tots, the developmentally delayed, or the easily impressed. i was looking forward to seeing little johnny throw his cereal across the room/smack little susie/swear like a sailor to test it out. little did i know that i would need to implement it on staff.

"an argument takes two people, with just one person, its a temper tantrum" (some developmental big wig i read recently, 2007). there have been tears (not mine) and pouting (not the 5 year olds). this is what happens when you have this many women (two of which are pregnant) working in such close quarters. i fail to see how polygamy sounds like a good idea.